At a Stand-Still...

A living contradiction...
with repetitive contradictory thoughts.
That's what I am...
I want, but don't need you.
I know if it is meant to be...
then it will be, but as time flies...
I begin to lose all hope.
It shouldn't be this difficult.
I don't want to be the cause of any stress for you.
But, in that same breath,
I can't seem to make you happy.
So, I'm at a stand-still.
Can't move forward.
Don't want to move back...
I've come too far to regress.

Running this race,
I've seen the finish line,
but I suppose that was merely a mirage.
You deserve to be content,
and even though I want to be what makes you happy,
I can't be....
...because I don't.
I bring forth confusion.
unintentional confusion,
but confusion, nonetheless.

I've altered my future by meeting you,
but I can't alter the past,
nor would I want to...

Hopeless Romantics Anonymous...
That's what I need.
because life isn't like Romeo and Juliet or Cinderella.
There aren't always happy endings.
But, when I look at you...
I can still feel the spark.... there's so much potential.
A surge of energy flows through my body...
and that's how I know it's true.
But, I still don't know what to do...
what to say?...
My mind goes blank.
I'm at a stand-still.

-Nigia M. Mew
aka
A LuvliiYPosh Orig.