No Safe Bets

I don't want to be your safe bet.
When you wake up...
I want to be that thought.
When you see something beautiful...
Let it be a remembrance of me.
Let your love for me transcend time and space.
Let it be unruly and illogical.
Let the vast Earth around you seem void
And lifeless without my presence.
Let me captivate the deepest impenetrable thoughts in your mind.
I want your love for me to be the fire within you.
Let the sight of me wreak havoc on your hormones.
Let my scent excite you,
And my demeanor entice you.
Let me into all of who you are.
So much so that  you do not exist without me.

I want your relentless,
I want your undeniable,
I want all of your love, and all of you.
I don't want to be your safe bet.

Time capsule (draft)

many years ago,
You surely caught my eye.
But you were intrigued by another girl,
so I became a friend and stayed to the side.
Then before I knew it,
it was we,
No longer just you nor me
And I thought we were at the time,
But we were not ready.

I liked you a lot,
But didn't know how to show it.
Young minded and immature
You couldn't control it,
And it tore us apart,
But we remained together.
I tried to stay put despite the inclement weather...
I learned that I was a woman scorned,
And you were dealing too.
Turns out we not only needed time,
We also needed room...
to grow up and face the world...
To experience life and its uncertainties.
But that doesn't stop me from wondering...
At a different time...
And different place...
Could we have been meant to be?

1095 days passed until I found someone new,
we met on a whim,
But clicked
he was familiar.
Reminded me of someone that I knew.
I didn't see it coming
But love grabbed me by the throat..
It held on until my choke
Was muffled and my life was revoked.
Then everything I knew went up in smoke
I was so in love I couldn't tell up from down.
I gave up on friendships,
My main concern was holding him down.
when it came down to it.
I would've done anything for him...
and the feelings I felt couldn't be shown
Had it not been for verse 1 to be truthful.

I can't say that he deserved my love,
But we do live and we learn.
I pray that with some guidance
And wisdom...
I'll find the one for whom I yearn.